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The African Church Of Truth

How to Get On with People You Don't Like

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v     Try to adopt a tolerant approach

1.     Liking or not should not affect the way you relate to employees.

2.     Be tolerant and positive in your attitude.

3.     Be confident, don’t be put off by people who can 
 be hard to get on with.


v     Practise liking people

1.      Create opportunities to recognize individual achievements.

2.      Remember people’s names.

3.      Treat all people with respect.

4.      Concentrate on the work context only.

5.      Focus on the person’s good points and don’t be too critical. [One man story: quote, ‘her arms are too fat, her legs are too short, she is too big in the bust and she has a slight pot belly]. He still married her-twice.


v     Be flexible about how you respond to the behaviour of others

                         1.      If the person always reacts aggressively, give
                                responsibility and encourage ownership.

2.      If the person carries personal grudge, avoid discussions about pet peeve.

3.      If the person never admits to being wrong, avoid direct criticism, sarcasm and ridicule. Deal with it in private.

4.      If the person is argumentative, stay calm and cite hard facts and figures to present an alternative position.

5.      If the person is over talkative, have someone interrupt you at a prescribed time, or plead another appointment or start to move away.


v     Keep your relationship formal but friendly

1.      Being formal does not necessarily mean you avoid employee altogether.

2.      The above clearly means that you confine your interest in this person to work related matters.

3.      By this way, the interaction will be kept minimum and will not interfere with work outcomes.

4.      Let the employee make the first move to discuss any matters not related to the job.


              v     Never let a relationship cloud your Managerial

      Managers/Team leaders who set out to be liked by
everyone all the time are heading for problems,
just as those who don’t patch up differences will in time inherit a similar batch of Managerial headaches.


        Delegate even if you don’t get along with someone.

        Invite their participation in committees/tasks/operations etc.


v     Talk to the employee
       Life is too short to get trapped into playing
       games such as I don’t like you or I am not talking to 
       If there is a problem with an employee, talk about it 
       with him or her in a mature, non threatening manner.


v     Make changes
As a result of talking over the matter with the
        employee, you may recommend some changes. If
        you are in the wrong in any way, admit it and resolve
        to do something about it.

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